Saturday, January 7, 2012

FOUR SIGNS YOUR CHRISTIAN HUSBAND MIGHT BE CHEATING ON YOU


I live in a county with a high volume (and tolerance) for the impromptu affair. It is also an overwhelmingly conservative, Christian county which makes it that much harder to determine adultery. I mean, Christians are supposed to avoid [falsely] accusing each other, to avoid causing division "among the brethren", and to avoid being busybodies. Consequently, some of the most unhealthy relational behavior becomes inadvertently protected. The elevation of these New Testament maxims over, say, the Ten Commandments (or common sense), discourages the ferreting out of adultery in the self-proclaiming Christian man more than in the man who makes no such claim (or who prefers not to market that aspect of himself).


Seriously, what do you do when you have a suspicion or proof even that a friend or acquaintance is cheating on his wife? And he has kids? And he has a reputation to lose were he to be found out? I'm not talking about going on a witch hunt or being a Wienersnitch. I'm talking about putting to rest the open loops in our minds when we see or sense peculiar patterns of the men around us who, whether or not it's true, consider us to be friends. 


I have been in more awkward circumstances than I care to admit where a belligerent Evangelical or Charismatic male personality made it clear that something was not quite right about himself and was so comfortable with himself that he was too clever for his own good to realize the signs he was leaving the rest of us. Here are four signs that your Christian husband might have some shennanigans up his sleeve (or up his pants leg):


1. Exclusive use of Evangelical Language. All day Sunday is one thing and Wednesday night (for some people) another. But men who have regular jobs Monday through Saturday who exclusively (or as much as possible) use religious code to speak of work, politics, how they are doing, finances, etc. are intentionally hiding something. I mean religious code is not specific enough to communicate certain kinds of information ("Gunny, when it comes to pass, concentrate your men of God on the coordinates of the pagan enemy. Blast those idol worshipers to Kingdom Come in the name of the Father, the Son,and the Holy Spirit." or "IT guy, my computer is infested with all sorts of unrighteousness. Would you be willing to move your bowels of compassion to help me purge it like hyssop, making it whiter than snow? I'm on a deadline, just what Satan would like. But I'm pro-life."). It's called "changing the subject", and it's not any more natural than it would be to use religious code to describe a Big Mac or a new pair of shoes. I've seen it (heard it) hundreds of times:


Business Partner: "Hey, there was $60,000 in the operations account. Now, there is only $25,000. Where is the other $35,000?"


Blessed Business Partner: "Hey, Bill, stop panicking. Panicking is sin. Scripture says that God will provide. The Israelites panicked in the wilderness, and that's why they are no longer God's chosen people. I will find out what happened to the money, but you need to promise me that you are going to trust God and trust me, or God might not bless our company. Do you want to still be one of God's chosen people?"


Business Partner: "But you're the treasurer!"


Blessed Business Partner: "Bill... Scripture says 'Cast thy cares upon the Lord.' You are in rebellion."


Business Partner: "All I'm saying is..."


Blessed Business Partner: "'Get thee behind me, Satan!'"


Religious code in these sorts of situations not only discourages communication, but it intentionally muddies the waters. I recently spoke with a man who has done his share of disseminating seed behind his wife's back. Our conversation went something like the following:


Me: "So how are things with the wife?"


Him: "God's strength is perfect."


Me: "That's nice. What does your wife have to say about your affairs?"


Him: "God's grace is sustaining her. And He's been giving us a calm we have never felt before."


Me: "OK, but does she know how many women you've been sleeping with?"


Him: "In his time."


This guy was not interested in reconciling with his wife, and his unrelated use of God-words clearly made that point.


2. The Underscore of Chauvinism through Scripture (at Odd Times). I am intrigued with men who find the need to quote Scripture whenever the subject of successful women or their wives comes up. Even if you were just talking about a subject like sports or stocks where the language is industry-specific, all of a sudden you are subject to an antiquated sermon about women. The sermon usually surrounds some confusing nexus about why these particular husbands don't "allow" their wives to do certain things like not allowing them their own career interests, not allowing them social network outlets, not allowing them to (in any way shape or form) have a voice that matters in any cultural conversation the husband does not control. 



Man 1: "So, did you go to the game last night?"


Man 2: "Yeah, we owned! It was awesome!"


Man 1: "Did your wife go?"


Man 2: "Oh, she was with the kids. She doesn't even like games. She wouldn't understand them anyway."


Man 1: "Do you take her out much?"


Man 2: "She loves being at home. These men who have wives who work or who gallivant all over the place end up causing themselves trouble. The Bible makes it clear that a woman's place is in the home. She should be doing whatever is necessary to support her husband, and last night my wife was supporting me by watching the kids while I saw the game."


Man 1: "What does she do for fun?"


Man 2: "Oh, she has a ladies night. Once a month or so. Other than that she's busy with the kids. She likes to sew. She reads. Hey, what about that game!"



I personally avoid these men's wives, because the hungry vibes they give off (or the deep breath they have to take to dive into normal, male interaction) are, well, uncomfortable.


3. Irregular or Unexplained Absences. I'm not certain why it's OK for husbands to unexpectedly disappear for a time from dinner, from the office, from church, from the city (you name it) but it is not OK for wives to do the same. In the community I live in, work is so integrated as to be indistinguishable from break time or play. People work at Starbucks. They work at restaurants. They conference call when running. They network while doing Crossfit. They Facebook all hours of the day. So it only makes sense for men to use the excuse that they are "going to work" or "getting work done" or "having a meeting" when you see them at strange places around town (or out of town).


I was recently in a local store a few days before Christmas looking at JBL stereo systems when I ran into a friend I've known for fourteen years. When I asked about her husband (a friend of mine, too), she informed me that they were divorced. She described how he fluctuated between work and unemployment. One extended stint when he was not working, he set up a home office to deceive her into thinking he was working. He would tell her that he would be in the home office working on time-sensitive deals. Occasionally, she would intrude on him only to find out he was not there. He was always leaving out the back door. Whenever she would call him up (and she did this frequently), he was always at the gas station getting cigarettes or at some meeting. 


I have a good friend who just moved across the U.S. I pretty much know his schedule. I can even call him at odd times and project where he will be. Nine times out of ten I'm right. He wants me to know his schedule, because he wants to be on the radar. I've spoken with wives who cannot even tell me what their husband's overseas schedule is much less his in-town schedule. I've had women complain to me that they cannot get their husbands on the phone at all during a 10-12 hour work day. The cell rings until it goes to voice-mail, or the husband prefers to text hours later.


I'm not saying that time will never allow you the use of these things, but as habits never. Such husbands don't even bother to offer where they were beyond the blanket "I was at work." It really isn't that hard to keep tabs on your husband or for your husband to let you know where he is. If he wants you to know, that is (and if you want to know).


4. The Overhauling of Relationships. Many a man I know has gotten extra-religious before his infidelity became public. In evangelical and charismatic denominations, it takes the form of an unexplained, theological shift. Not only does the man have a problem with the pastor of the church that he has willfully attended for years, but he also has a problem with the pastor's wife and the pastor's children and the pastor's teaching style and the pastor's personality and the pastor's choice of deacons and elders and the theology and the denomination and the history of the church, and everything in between. 


Then he disappears for a time while he's "sorting" things out: checking out churches, studying the Bible, meeting new religious circles. Then one day he's gone altogether. And no one bothers asking why (or people think they know why). I have known many friends to unexpectedly switch to Anglican, Roman Catholic, Fundamentalist, and agnostic expressions of faith. And they can never adequately explain their choices, largely because they think that the rest of us just wouldn't understand. I've actually had friends advised by their new spiritual guides to completely leave behind their old life so that the new one can take root (And I'm sure it does. Like a weed.). That's a foolish and generous berth for these men to do whatever they want to do without someone who really knows them getting too nosy. 


While only a few of these friends of mine ended up leaving their wives, sudden life changes, like changes in temperature, can ruin things permanently (I just ruined my freezer this weekend, thinking I could thaw it in the winter. Not only did it take extra-long to defrost, but it seems that the compressor froze up). 


I remember seeing a hipster friend I've known for years, swapping cars with a lady not his wife in a part of town I have never since seen him in. As I passed by, I remember almost calling him and then changing my mind. There are fifty reasons he could be swapping cars with a woman not his wife (couldn't there be?). I let that bit of rationale suppress my suspicion. So that I didn't even make the connection to the suspicious-looking bruises I saw on his wife's arm months before. And I could have sworn she had been crying. But, there could be fifty reasons why she had bruises on her arm and why there were tears in her eyes at the same time. Couldn't there be?


What is pitiful about these four signs is that the wife almost never sees them. These are ways men act in front of other men. Over the years my friends and I have agreed that it is better to be presumptive and preemptive than to allow these open loops to become ever wider. Who cares if your friend is offended? Really? What's the worse he can do but give you some Old Testament reason as to why he's screwing another man's wife? 


I've heard those lines, too.

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  27. I got my man back with the help of Kwale Temple. Without delay I was able to get my man back after 6 months of break up, I got him back after 48 hours with the help of Kwale Temple. You can contact Dr Kwale on kwaletemple@gmail.com or add him up on Whats App +2348056141089

    ReplyDelete
  28. Greetings to every one that is reading this testimony. I had been rejected by my husband after five(5) years of marriage just because another woman had cast a spell on him and he left me with 2 kids to suffer. One day when i was reading through the web, i saw a post on how he help a woman to get back her husband and i gave him a chance he told me that my husband is under spell, he said that he will help me and after 7 days that i will have my husband back. i believed he and today i am glad to let you all know that this spell caster has the power to bring lovers back now my husband is back with after 7 days . he also gave me a financial magic ring to boost my business and removed bad luck. i am now happy with my husband. Thanks you Dr. love please contact him at (lovespelldoctor0@gmail. com)

    ReplyDelete
  29. Hello everyone, I'm here to let the whole world know of a man called Dr. Ekpen he is a spell caster and he is the man that helps me in my restore my marriage when my husband broke up with me, he use his power and gift to restore joy in my relationship. I want to also let the whole world know that he can still help if you are been blackmail by someone or you want to win a court case he can help. Contact him today via email: ekpentemple@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  30. i want to say a big thank you to DR peter for helping me get back my ex wife after 6 months of breakup. It was like a dream come true when my wife came back asking for second chance after leaving me and the kids for 6 months without communication. Thank you dr peter I will forever be grateful. You can contact dr peter for any spell including spell to heal any sickness and diseases via peterwiseherbalcenter@ gmail. com. Or WhatsApp him +2349059610643

    ReplyDelete
  31. I was heartbroken because i had very small penis, not nice to satisfy a woman, i had so many relationship cut off because of my situation, i have used so many product which i found online but none could offer me the help i searched for. i saw some few comments about this specialist called Dr OKISIN and decided to email him at dr.okisinsolutiontemple@gmail.com, so I decided to give his herbal product a try. i emailed him and he got back to me, he gave me some comforting words with his herbal pills for Penis Enlargement, Within 14days of it, i began to feel the enlargement of my penis, " and now it just 2 weeks of using his products my penis is about 9 inches longer and i am so happy, contact DR OKISIN now via email dr.okisinsolutiontemple@gmail.com  or his Whatsapp number +2348149508633. may God reward you for your good work.
    HE ALSO RENDER THE FOLLOWING ........1.  BRING YOUR EX BACK........... 2. LOTTERY SPELL......... 3. PREGNANCY SPELL ..........4. WEAK ERECTION ............5. POOR EJACULATION.............

    ReplyDelete
  32. My wife is a bloody cheat. Thanks to elizabethjone146@gmail.com
    who was able to unveil everything by hacking into my wife whats-app
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    how i was able to trace my wife conversations with men and found out
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    phone. elizabethjone146@gmail.com you really worth more praises am really grateful
    Contact elizabethjone146@gmail.com
    WhatsApp +18572012269 for help

    ReplyDelete
  33. Hello all
    am looking few years that some guys comes into the market
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    ReplyDelete
  34. If you need hacking services, only hire professionals. Cyber ​​consulting solutions increase the likelihood of job completion. In addition to getting a permanent fix for the service he provided me, I hired an elite service, but provided very efficient customer service. He walked me through every process and did not leave me in the dark to reach me by email or WhatsApp cyberwizardsolutions@gmail.com +60 11-3332 4961.

    ReplyDelete
  35. Dr.Mamudu the best spell caster online restore my broken relationship and i highly recommends Dr.Mamudu to anyone in need of help!
    My husband left me for another woman 3 months ago and ever since then my life have been filled with pains sorrow and heart break because he was my first love whom i have spent my entire life with. A friend of mine told me he saw some testimonies of a spell caster called Dr Mamudu that he can bring back lover within some few days, i laugh it out and said i am not interested but because of the love my friend had for me, she consulted the great priest on my behalf and to my greatest surprise after 2 days my husband called me for the very first time after three months that he is missing me and that he is so sorry for every thing he made me went through.He came back to me and now we are happy together. I still can’t believe it, because it highly unbelievable. Thank you Dr.Mamudu for bringing back my lover and also to my lovely friend who interceded on my behalf, for any one who might need the help of this great priest here is the email address: drmamudu47@gmail. com , you can also call him or add him on Whats-app: +2348143284524

    ReplyDelete
  36. I saw a comment here a few weeks ago about Dr Agbazara and i decided to contact him as instructed, thanks to this man for bringing joy to me as wished for. i followed instructions which he gave in other to get my lover back who left me and the kids for 3years now, but thanks to Dr Agbazara because they are back to me now for good and we are happy together. please do contact him for help too if in relationship problem via email at: ( agbazara@gmail.com ) OR Via WhatsApp on: ( +2348104102662 ). And testify for yourself.  

    ReplyDelete
  37. Hi moderator!!! My name is Celina..I thought i was feeling so insecured when my partner would be on his phone at odd hours and always moving around the rooms with his mobile phones i know something its not right and it started becoming unbrearable for me UNTIL I met this Genius HACKER!! his direct number for call/texts is +.1 6015165326 and his email is invisiblehackingloops at gmail dot com. HE can get you access into phone activities, without physical contact with the phone .. He will access the phone remotely with the telephone number ..you can see all text messages, whatsapp, viber, messenger, know target exact location at any time. listen to calls and getting messages on the spyware dashboard...... even deleted messages for months will be available to view , the spyware app also jail break social media or email accounts with icloud information..... Any accounts/phones you need to get into just reach out to him directly he's professional in programming and he will show you evidence from his previous clients... what i found on my partner phone is scaring and overwhelming and made me realise i have been in darkness all this while, Thanks to Hackingloop and he charged little fee.......... at least the spyapp helped my life and i'm no more in darkness and i know what next in my life....

    ReplyDelete
  38. Never met any hacker as discreet and fast like this White Collar Hackers. They are called WhiteHats and they has helped me in multiple ways first was when my ex spouse cheated on me- they got me every information from my spouse phone number and now they are helping me paying my credit cards debts. They have the best hacking tools plus service any one can ever imagine and I recommend him to the world. I am thankful and grateful for the second chance. Honestly, WhiteCollar hackers are life savers please contact them here if you need their swift service Email; WhitehatspytechATcyberservicesDOTcom

    ReplyDelete
  39. "I was in Miami with my HUSBAND and his parent for vacation. We had flown there on their private jet for a

    great weekend. Something felt off. Like, really off. And I did what you're never supposed to do I reached

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    out he slept with someone else! So, there I am in Miami with his family with no way of hopping a flight back

    and we weren't scheduled to leave for 2 more days. And this was our wedding anniversary. Right before dinner

    with his family." MEN ARE WHAT?

    ReplyDelete
  40. Many people have written articles about how they were helped but I am very grateful to this great man who brought my ex-husband back to me. This testimony is a true story and my name is Jennifer Sanchez. When I came in contact with this man was also through a testimony written about him helping with a cure for Herpes Virus and I have also encountered many testimonies about how he has been helping others with their life. To get back with an ex is one of the most innermost feelings many people would love to experience especially as those memories with our ex always cloud our mind when someone else does some of those things our ex used to do. I was a single parent of two boys for almost 6 years and though my ex-husband was not staying with me and the kids I still wish someday he will return to me. This doctor I encountered is known as Dr. Odunga helped me with my wishes and I am happy to write on this website that my ex-husband is back with me. I am very happy to share the testimony with everyone so that they too can meet this great doctor and solve their problems. I don't know what others might feel about getting their ex back in their life but I always know there is a blessing in disguise with just a single re-connection with an ex. If you want to successfully get back with your ex or facing an infertility problem, contact this great man at odungaspelltemple@gmail.com Or WhatsApp/Call +2348167159012 and share an awesome testimony too just as I did

    ReplyDelete
  41. How to get things done has always been with Michael cyberlord582@gmail.com honestly
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    ReplyDelete
  42. Are you looking to hire a hacker? Then look no further. Grayhathacks is a team of proffesional hackers who are reliable with a success rate of close to 100% on any hacking jobs you enlist their services for.
    Their listed services include but are not limited to:
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    But don't just take my word for it, try them and drop your testimonial as well.
    Contact them via email at grayhathacks@contractor.net

    ReplyDelete
  43. I ran a new stop sign on my old street. I didn't know it was there, and the sun was coming up in a direction that blinded me when I was driving to work in August. I stopped too early, but I knew it was around that location. When I started driving again, the police officer was parked on the street across from the stop sign. I didn't want to be late for work, so I didn't want to try and explain what happened. Shortly after this incident, I moved to another city and didn't receive my court date paperwork until after the fact. I lost my ticket, and my license was suspended as a result. To cut the long story short my wife referred me to grayhathacks (she had read numerous positive testimonies about them online). I was skeptical at first. It was more like a test to hire them, I was curious to see what they would do and they exceeded my expectations. Within a few hours which seemed to be minutes they were able to erase this off my record. I was short for words with just how much they would do remotely and with the help of technology. Their hacking skills are incomparable that it's scary. Hats off to them. If you need help with any kind of hacking, you could reach out to them via email at grayhathacks@contractor.net
    Be sure to leave them a review as well I'm certain they'll impress you too.

    ReplyDelete

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