As a Gen-Xer raised in a military family overseas, I was taught to be deflect any attention that came my way onto anything that was 1) close enough, 2) big enough, and 3) much more interesting. It first began as a matter of survival but then later dovetailed into a religious principle of devoted self-marginalization which lasted for the better part of four decades.
That notion of humility isn't anything to brag about either. It's humiliating, debilitating, and can also be lethal. I know this because it almost cost me my life. In all of my training
First, do no harm.
Hippocrates penned those words. He was he Ancient Greek physician after whom the Hippocratic Oath is named. The idea is that saving life is the goal, and the practice is that every step contribute to the goal. The problem for people with a marginalized view of themselves, however, is that First, do no harm always applies to others and never to yourself. Realistically, First, do no harm should apply to yourself first if you are ever to First, do no harm to another.
Before you heal someone,
ask him if he's willing to give up the things
that make him sick.
Hippocrates also said that. And we should each apply this rule to ourselves first before we apply it to others. And here's the reason why. Because when you want others to be fixed more than you want it for yourself, it's not really healing that you want: it's distraction. And that distraction can last only as long as others never get well.
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